Hey, Dave, we have an extra spot in our campaign tonight. Why don’t you roll up a character and join us?”
“Sorry, I’m going out with my girlfriend.”
“Oh, yeah. Forgot about her. I gotta get me one of them someday.”
And that conversation, repeated over four years, is why I never played Dungeons and Dragons in college. It wasn’t until three years later that I played my first campaign, a homebrewed adventure written by one of my housemates. He felt it was essential that I have some D&D experience if I was going to continue writing interactive live roleplaying games (another story for another time).
Despite my mercifully brief brush with one of the oldest time-sucks, I must have been incubating a low-level infection for more than 25 years. What other cause could explain my inability to resist this offering from Jones Soda?
I ordered a 12-pack of Spellcasting Soda, which arrived today. Despite the clever names – which would probably mean a lot more to me if I had a copy of the Dungeonmaster’s Guide or Monster Manual – the contents are just some of the straight-up flavors Jones is known for:
- Dwarven Draught – Root Beer
- Potion of Healing – Black Cherry
- Sneak Attack – Cream
- Eldritch Blast – Green Apple
- Illithid Brain Juice – Grape
- Bigby’s Crushing Thirst Destroyer – Cola
I need to figure out which one to drink to give me the courage to order this year’s Holiday Pack. Turkey Gravy or Candy Corn soda, anyone?
I ordered the same pack for Rudy’s D&D elective class. (He’s running it, so it seems like it’s cool to show up with some swill.)
Clearly, you are the best father ever.
Want, want, want, want! Yay geekery!
If you’re good, I’ll let you have some.